Here's a few pictures from this morning.
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| Two new little buds |
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| Missing you ALWAYS Matty |
In August, Shannon and I decided to cautiously try again for another baby. Much to our surprise, we found out I was pregnant on August 23rd. I had met with a new doctor the day before I got a positive home pregnancy test. My doctor so far has been wonderful and has been very proactive with doing early testing and whatnot to monitor how the pregnancy was going from the start. I had my first day of blood work done on Monday, August 27th. On Wednesday I was told that my hcg levels were 76 and my progesterone levels were 23. Everything looked good so far. I had blood drawn on Wednesday evening and again on Friday. On Wednesday my hcg results were 147. They numbers didn't quite double but I was assured that it was okay. Typically your hcg levels are suppose to double every 48-72 hours. Those were my levels after 48 hours. I had my last draw done on Friday.
I was told to call the on call doctor on Saturday to find out my results from Friday. I waited until after 2 and then had the on call doctor paged yesterday. At first she told me that she did not have access to the results and that I was given incorrect information. I was extremely disappointed because my anxiety had been through the roof since my last numbers came in. She then went on to tell me that if she had access to them at any point that day that she would call me back. About 25 minutes later she called back...
She gave me devastating news...my hcg levels dropped to 140. She said this is a sign of an impending miscarriage. My heart just stopped and I immediately began to cry. I couldn't believe this was happening again. She gave me a list of things to watch for and told me she wanted me in her office on Tuesday morning.
The last 24 hours have been rough. I just feel so heartbroken and so confused. I don't understand why this is happening AGAIN. We waited and gave my body time to heal before trying again. I lost over 15 pounds and took care of a lot of health issues to ensure that I had a healthier pregnancy this time around. I'm so angry right now.
We used ovulation test this cycle and we charted again using Fertility Friend.
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| Positive OPK |
I got my first positive pregnancy test on August 23rd. I was only 10DPO (days past ovulation). It was pretty faint but a definite positive!
And continued to test for several days after I got my first positive...
Tomorrow I should be 5 weeks pregnant and now I just wait until things start to happen naturally. This is the worst part. This has been an incredibly stressful week.
On Wednesday, we were headed to Shannon's work and we were about a mile away from the house when someone slammed into the back of our car. We were completely stopped, waiting to turn left onto another street. It was a 35mph road but we have no idea how fast the driver was actually going. We did hear her brakes before she hit us. We haven't heard back from the insurance adjuster yet but we are almost positive that it's totaled. The other drivers insurance company has been rather difficult and caused me an immense amount of stress on Thursday and Friday of this past week. I had to deal with some very rude and inconsiderate insurance reps. I hate that we are being made out to be the "bad guys" when we didn't cause the accident! The boys and I all went to the hospital to get checked out but we were all okay. Shannon hurt his neck pretty bad but nothing serious. I got a minor scrap on my arm but no idea how! Part of me feels like the accident had/has something to do with me losing this baby now but I have been assured that it likely was not the cause. Stress is a possibility but not the accident in itself. I have been under so much stress since I found out I was pregnant because of fear of losing another one...
Poor Samuel has been having a hard time as well. He seemed okay right after the accident..he was in awe of all the police cars, ambulance and firetruck that arrived to the scene but since then he has been acting funny. I am thinking it has affected him more than I thought and now everything with this baby, I am sure he is sensing something is up/wrong...
Not sure who is still reading my blog but I'll keep you updated as I know more. Hopefully things happen sooner than later because I am having a really hard time with it right now...trying to understand God's purpose in all of this.
