I often visit my husband at work but haven't lately. I decided that I would take Samuel to visit his daddy this evening. Shannon had told several people at work that we were expecting about a week before we lost the baby, however he hasn't told many that we lost Matty. As I was leaving, a coworker said to Shannon and I " I bet you guys are hoping this baby is a girl?" My heart just sank and I almost started crying. I was completely speechless and it caught me completely off guard. I wasn't able to say "we lost our baby". Thankfully Shannon was able to muster it out. It broke my heart even more to hear those words.."actually we lost the baby.." I know it broke Shannon's heart to say those words. I just couldn't do it.
I think she felt embarrassed for not knowing that we lost our baby but it wasn't her fault. She finally asked how far along I was and I told her. Then she went on to play it off like it was still early and not a big "deal". I felt in a way that she was insensitive but maybe when we are embarrassed we say things we shouldn't? I wish more people understood that it is a BIG deal and a huge loss. She said "well you guys can try again..."
Hoping for a better day tomorrow...
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